i want to go far away and let my heart be the guide. I don’t know why you are afraid of gettig hurt and afraid of breaking hearts. i am terrified of that and i know that it can happen but such are the risks we take to live more fully, live inspredly and say we did it. doesn’t it feel better to jump than to slowly walk down? doesn’t it feel better to not know where the bottom is, free fall and feel the wind on you? when you walk you feel no wind you see everything as it happens and cotnrol everything much like in graph paper but if you get out of the notebook it is that amazing rush, amazing feeling, alll of the f-in serotonin rushing rthrough your head and making you feel like no drug can ever make you feel,. it is a terryfing feeling but it is also the feeling that creates wonderful words, beautiful painitings, writing, creativity, runs in the ice cold weather, and emotions that range way beyond the convention. Artists bask in tears to paint their canvas. otmusicians too, and bask in love and storng strong emotions. accountants can’t handle that, stockbrokers will crumble. I am noteither, but i do love the spirit, the free falling, the life.
and i am sorry i cannot think in a more practical manner. i try, i try, but my heart craves the rush of serotonin once again. same rush created by beautiful music, beautiful reading and wondrous adventures. same voice that makes me restless and so happy about random things. and i am willing to jump rightn now.
